Post 1 of 433 about my kitchen

When I closed on my condo 3 years ago my kitchen was the first thing I was going to fix. But kitchens are expensive and a lot of work so it’s remained a snapshot of the mid-70s since I’ve moved in.

But I hate it. The cabinets are cheap and way too small. The countertop is marigold Formica and it climbs up the wall. Even the paper towel rack is crooked.

So it’s time. I am ripping out everything – shitty particle board cabinets, stained Formica, ugly floral door hardware, atrocious ceiling fan, and even the sheetrock, and I am replacing it all.

Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve picked out cabinets, countertops, door hardware, lighting, etc. Adjectives to describe the new kitchen – modern, clean, simple, sleek, warm, efficient, useful.

For the amount of time I spend in the kitchen, I expect that this remodel will have a positive impact on my life. I like cooking. I dislike playing Jenga with my bowls to fit them into the cabinet.

The best part of this kitchen adventure is that my Dad offered to come down here to help me do it. And by “help me” I mean he’s the captain and I am the skipper. Or deck hand. Or whatever the boat term is for “helper person.”

So the week of Thanksgiving, I will be hauling, hammering, cutting and cursing it up with the parents in the kitchen. I’ve taken the lead on the pre-planning since, hey, that’s what I do. I was really tempted to block this project out in Microsoft Project, since it would the only time the software would actually function properly. But I decided that asking Dad to purchase expensive software for my kitchen project was overkill.

I plan on posting updates throughout the process. It will be just like you are with me, except I won’t put you to work and you might miss out on the good cursing. Though that is likely to make for entertaining posts, so maybe not.

Today was the first day of real work. I replaced the shelves in my pantry, and learned the hard way how to remove door knobs that don’t have visible screws.